In light of the  Spiritual Marketplace that has developed over recent years, I have some “real deal” observations to share. It is good that there has been such an awakening, however we are also to exercise mindfulness and discretion in these times when seeking teachers, healers, retreats and those who can assist us in our quest for healing and empowerment.

In no particular order and please take note of what resonates and recycle what does not:

1. Attunements and “activations” do not happen long distance. They can yes if need be, if there is no alternative , because time and distance are but human concepts. However if it were so simple that we were “activated” or attuned long distance with a click of one button, well where would be the journey and the learning. Attunements require community, they require space holding and more than that active participation by us. If you sat and watched TV while someone activated your this that and other to this that and other level so you were now a super being, I would very much question the truth of all this. And ask yourself why are you looking for a quick fix. The real deals have walked the path for years and have gone through many initiations over days and nights and weeks and months. The real deals did not click a button and have someone send them an empowerment. The real deals went out onto the land, deep into themselves and sought the power, the answers, the lessons.

2. Mind Body Spirit Festivals = a really powerful healer/ teacher. The real deals have no need to set up a stall in a large conference hall and tout for business. The real deals do not stand on stage and perform a healing or perform a drumming circle. Why? Because the real deals are out there doing the work with those who really need the work and those who really need the work are rarely at large events like these. The real deals also do not believe in selling the work as a business. Exchanges are important, always, the work must be honoured. However there are exchanges and then there are exchanges. The real deals are not looking to be celebrities. They are just doing the work for the sake of the work.

3. The work is easy and anyone can do it. Not true. What teachers and healers will not tell you, will not sell you is that being a healer, being a teacher is HARD work. It means going to the very deepest darkest spaces in yourself, facing fears and pains, wounds and hopefully coming out the other side.  The work is NOT easy, it is hard graft. It is hard work to hold space for another so they can heal. It is dirty work because as one sits and holds space for another to release and unburden some of that residue, that sadness, that anger, that grief, those emotions get transferred onto the healer. Then the healer goes off and has to clear themselves. That can take days or weeks. That is the unseen work that goes on. And that is why an exchange is so important, we are honouring all the healer does, much of which is unseen. The real deals are always clearing and self examining so they can offer their students and their clients the very best.

4. The real deals present an image to you which feels authentic. If the smile is painted on too brightly, if the speak is all love light and bunnies, if the facade seems a little too bright it may well be.

5. The real deals do not offer quick fixes and do not promise anything other than perhaps greater self awareness at the end of the process. They do not say buy this meditation and meet your twin flame! They do not say buy this course and heal yourself for good and also get lots of money coming into your life. They will tell you all is a process and anything can happen and perhaps nothing will happen depending on where you are at and what you put in. They offer tools that can assist you NOT save you.

6. The real deals have boundaries. They do not get overly familiar with you and start sending you text messages confirming appointments signed off with kisses. They do not ask you to heal them after an attunement- yes this happens! They do not invite you to their house for dinner or make a pass at you! The real deals know that coming for a healing is a very sensitive thing and that the whole process must be handled with integrity and with strong boundaries. And that these boundaries contain the work and allow you to really feel safe and honoured. Real deals will not touch you inappropriately or make suggestive comments and when transference occurs- as it can in the therapeutic relationship, they address it directly or by making it very clear that this relationship is purely about healing. Be wary of anything to the contrary. You may develop a friendship that is true- however the real deals will foster this largely when you are no longer the client or student, when the nature of the connection has changed.

7. Real deals are not sitting on social media every day! They may have a presence but they also have a life outside of this and probably are in healings.

8. Real deals look in their power. This does not mean fancy clothes or expensive locations. This means when you meet them they look healthy and up to the work. If they are looking weak, scared, unsure of their environment then perhaps they are not in their power. Yes healers are human also. They may have a bad hair day, get the occasional spot, get a cold, be moody, have PMT, be running late, not like the room they are in, not understand how to work the air con- that is all fine! Come on, they are human! However if they look ill, weak in some way, if they seem unsure of the work, if they cannot make eye contact or offer you a viable solution or suggestion to your question/s then perhaps they are not in the best place for this work right now.

9. Real deals will not entice you to come to a workshop or a healing. They will not keep emailing or ringing you asking you if you would like to book in. They may do that once what with the wonders of technology and lost messages. If a healer or teacher is regularly asking you if you would like a healing, ask yourself why are they doing that?

10. The real deals want you in your power and out that door as soon as possible. They are not looking to have you sign up for endless sessions spread out over years. Be wary of anyone who says we may need to work together regularly for years. They are setting up a nice cash fund! Yes healing takes years it does. However the goal must always be to empower you and to have you back on track and feeling good. Regular sessions indefinitely are disempowering. We get used to thinking oh I’m seeing my healer next week they will sort me out, rather than saying how can I address this by myself. So make sure you are being empowered and not getting addicted! It is a fine line, to have that space holding and that could mean years and to know you are improving and getting stronger. The real deals will not weaken you and leave you vulnerable and confused.

11. The real deals walk the talk. If they tell you to undertake a practice which they have never done or if they claim to be able to bring x y or z into your life and yet their life is devoid of that- well how much have they embodied the medicine? Yes they are human! However a true medicine man or woman will have walked the path they are asking you to walk, how else can they guide you along it also?