Often when we take those first hesitant steps on the path of self healing, what we can be looking for is parenting. Someone who will sit on a moutain top and look down on us like the benevolent mother/father and tell us everything is going to be okay. And when we leave they will also say some magic words and things will suddenly miraculously change in our lives.

I know when I first started my journey 10 years back I was convinced that in between my weekly sessions my healer sat in a darkened room or in a forest and said magic spells that would transform my life. It took me a while to realise that though the space may have been held for me, the magic lay in me and the choices I made every day. The healing, the magic began the moment I left each healing and went back out into the world and into my world.

Healers hold the space for us to access that great inherant, Divine knowledge, healing and power in us. At times they can guide us to the fountain we may drink from, the space we may rest our weary bodies on. At times they may give us tools to help us move forwards through our dark nights of the Soul. And at times they may just provide the hand of compassion that says I have been there and I came through it and so can you.

When we start expecting our healers to magic away our issues and pain. When we have a resentment that the healing is not fixing us and yet we refuse to look at those parts of ourselves screaming out in pain- then all we do is hand over our Sovereignty and Power to another. We make the healer or teacher the Saviour and the Devil. We fluctuate between hating them and wanting to be them. Some of this is a natural process of awakening. However we also need to be mindful. We can replace one addiction with another. Whereas before we may have felt the job, the partner, the new wardrobe would remedy all- now we have placed that mantle on the shoulders of the healer/teacher sitting opposite us. And let’s remember the HUMAN being sitting opposite us.

In my opinion when we forget that our healers and teachers are human too- we are in danger of worshipping false gods. Really the true worship lies in our relationship to ourselves and to spirit. If a healing modality isnt working for you- well it could be this healer isnt right for you, it could be you are resisting and not doing the work, it could be there is another healing modality for you. Search and follow your instinct.

It is not for your healer to fix your life, it is not for your teacher to tell you what to do in your personal life. What helps you gain back your Power and your Strength is to day by day make these decisions by yourself and to ask Spirit. Your Truth is your truth and others will see a fragment of that diamond.

If you came to see a healer because your marriage was failing, you wanted to change jobs, you were tired of being single. And then a few weeks down the line when your marriage is still rocky, your job still unfulfilling, still single- who are you looking to “blame”. Of course the more we change our inner world the more our outside world reflects this. However we need a balance between the work we do internally and the action we take externally. All the meditations and healings in the world wont bring a partner/job your way if you are locked up in your house never getting out there!

We need to take the steps in the physical world too- it is not for your healer to save your marriage, it is not for yout teacher to help you find Love. You may have blocks to Love, you may be running away from speaking your Truth and your healer/teacher can help you heal and integrate these parts of yourself. And then that’s it- the rest is up to you!

In many indiginous communities, the Shaman will heal and then when the healing is over the rituals will be passed on and that will be it. There will be no hand holding or back patting. It will now be up to the person who has received the healing to go ahead and act on those rituals to honour the work. And to get on with the messy, incredible business of living. Why would we ask someone else to live our lives for us? Why would we ask someone else to make the most important decisions in our life? And why would we blame a meditation, a healing or a teacher when the decisions we have made have not worked out for us?

Being in our Power and true Self Mastery means showing up for ourselves every day. Not getting too dependant on a teacher or healer, a meditation or a way of connecting but through trial and error finding our own way to connect with Spirit every day, to make decisions to make choices.

We are autonomous beings and never let anyone tell you otherwise. Anyone who tells you that you would be lost without them, that you need them to be in your Power- whether they be a healer/teacher/partner/friend is not in my opinion being very truthful with you. And that may be more to do with their own need to feel powerful than your story.

We are infinitely powerful, we do have the ability to change our lives, to align with all that is for us. Not all we want but all we need when on the path of the Royal Road. And so no one holds the key to that. You do. Others may guide you- but it all rests with you. No one can give you that power, no attunement, no meditation, no workshop gives you anything. It may open you up to what is already inside you. It may allow you to clear blocks that have stood in the way of you connecting with your own Divinity and with Spirit. And that is all.

For we have always been connected, Spirit never left us- we merely lost our way, forgot to work on that relationship. Any healing or teaching is a re-awakening, a re-membering. And when you know that, then there can be no blame, there can be no resistance or no disappointment for all is as it always was and you are now simply re aligning yourself with that.