What is it to Self Love? How do we find the path way to the oasis of Love in us and for us?

I have been seeing much of this recently in my healing work. Those seeking Love, doing all they can to chase it and yet when it comes to one of the most intimate relationships we shall ever have- with our Self- self Love is lacking.

The 2 most important relationships in our lives are with Our Selves and with Spirit- in that order. For when we are in right relationship with our Self we can be in right relationship with Spirit. We stop the projection, the abdication of Power and the Guilt. We no longer do things to appease a wrathful Spirit, we no longer look to Spirit like a child to give us all we desire with no action in the physical world. We no longer clench our fists at the Divine when life does not go exactly how we planned it. We start to see the Union of Man and Spirit- as a working relationship. Where our earthly presence allows us to be Spirit manifest- to be Love in Action. To be the Holy in Action. In the most pro active and heart centred, non zealot way. For enforcing our pathway as the only one to Spirit is yet another example of lack of Self knowing and Love. What is it in us that feels we must convert and convince others to feel we are fulfilling our Purpose. Surely all we are here to do is follow our hearts and to spread Love and Compassion to others.

And so Self Love! Well many struggle with accepting this earthly incarnation. Thighs too big, breasts too small, nose too wonky, hair not dark enough, light enough- enough. We say we are not enough. I have struggled as much as the next person to accept this is my body, my face forever. That this is how I look and whether I like it or not its me. So I  better learn to like it- I wake up to it every day!

The fact is this is our vehicle, this is the costume we chose to wear in this incarnation- and that will have been for a very specific reason or set of reasons. In the so called faults we may find in our appearance will also be our greatest learnings. Most of all in acceptance. And if we cannot accept ourselves at the most naked and vulnerable- how can we ever truly accept another. Judgement shall be the nail in that coffin of intimacy long dwindled.

And of course we have the ability to change what we dont like. Do I mean go under the knife? Well no not really. Unless of course it truly is something that will bring peace to your life inside and out and not a band aid. I mean we can make the best of our attributes, of our strengths. Wear what suits us most, exercise to define our bodies, eat well to keep ourselves full with the Power of Life and so on. This is not about a self absorption this is about celebrating who you are.

Yes we see plenty on our screens about those who could not stop with the Botox and the surgery. I shall not make any comments here. Other than to say that often what we hear is the same person then went back in again and again. Somehow the wound does not seem to get “fxed”. And more than that the “fault” can be traced back to an event- a moment in time when something happened that shattered that innate belief we have as children that all is beautiful.

I did not notice the colour of my skin or others – until I first experienced racism at a young age. I did not start to judge my appearance until the first time someone told me there was something “wrong” with how I looked. Until then I believed all was perfect and how it was meant to be. I did not compare myself to another until someone else did that for me- and so the seeds of disconnection from Self began. And when disconnected from Self we are then further away from Spirit.

All is the face of Spirit. All have a place in nature from the most ornate animals and birds to the most neutral. All are equally worthy because as in an orchestra all have their own particular tune to play. If every one was one note in a band how dull would the resulting music be- a dirge of the senses.

When we celebrate our Selves and what makes us unique with humility we are thanking Spirit for all that has been gifted us. No matter how deficient it may seem. One of the main reason we universally have such profound respect for those who with debilitating injuries conquer the restrictions placed is because we see a human honouring what they do have, and using all they have to be all they came here to be. When we see those endure great crippling illnesses or injuries, disfigurments, not only go about their daily lives but then take on feats of endurance  we are humbled because it places our small concerns over thigh size into perspective.

Self Love will have its individual challenges for everyone. And it will be a unique journey for each of us and none is any less valid or worthy of care and compassion. Until we are in Love with Self we cannot truly Love another and we cannot come home to the arms of Spirit. We shall forever be comparing, competing, playing games, cheating, lieing, projecting from our wounds that ultimately say I am not good enough.

The fact is no one can heal that but us. No one can say we are good enough- but us to our Selves. Spirit has always loved us and always shall. Until we allow our Selves to feel worthy of Love we shall be unable to see that all we are is just good enough just as it is. No fixing needed- just acceptance and Love.

Here is to Self Love and Love United.